Tuesday, 31 March 2020

'Probably the worst year in a century': the environmental toll of 2019

The sun glows red during the ACT bushfires
The sun glows red during the ACT bushfires, one of the events that contributed to a disastrous 2019 for the environment in Australia. Photograph: Mike Bowers/The Guardian

Record heat and drought across Australia delivered the worst environmental conditions across the country since at least 2000, with river flows, tree cover and wildlife being hit on an “unprecedented scale”, according to a new report.
The index of environmental conditions in Australia scored 2019 at 0.8 out of 10 – the worst result across all the years analysed from 2000.
The year delivered unprecedented bushfires, record heat, very low soil moisture, low vegetation growth and 40 additions to the threatened species list.
The report’s lead author, Prof Albert van Dijk of the Australian National University’s Fenner school of environment and society, told Guardian Australia 2019 was “probably the worst in a century or more” for the environment.
“This is not the new normal – this is just getting worse and worse,” he said, adding that 2019 had seen a “continuing descent into an ever more dismal future. You start to see ecosystems fall apart and then struggle to recover before the next major disturbance.”
The Australia’s Environment report scored environmental conditions across seven indicators – inundation, streamflow, vegetation growth, leaf area, soil protection, tree cover and the number of hot days.
Across all years analysed, 2005 was the next worst year, impacted by the millennium drought. The year 2010 was the best; it was also one of Australia’s wettest on record.
Van Dijk said the cause of the impacts for 2019 were global heating as well as natural variability in Australia’s climate. The number of days above 35C was 36% higher than the previous 19 years.
The population had continued to grow and the country’s greenhouse gas emissions had remained high, the report said.
Greenhouse gas emissions per person were 11% below the 2000-18 average, but remained among the highest in the world because of high energy use per person and the burning of coal for electricity.
Findings were underpinned by about 1m gigabytes of data, including satellite data that only became available from 2000, as well as field data and on-the-ground surveys.
Reviewing biodiversity impacts, the report highlighted the number of spectacled flying foxes – one of many species vulnerable to heat stress – had dropped to 47,000 from an average of 100,000 before 2016.
The numbers of threatened species had risen by 36% since 2000, the report said.
River flows were 43% below the 2000-18 average, causing water storages to drop and mass fish deaths in the Murray-Darling Basin, and wetland environments had also seen record-low inundation.
River flows were above average around the coast of northern Queensland, around Karratha in Western Australia and at Strahan in Tasmania’s west.
The protection of soils by vegetation and moisture was “extremely poor”, causing dust storms. The average soil moisture was also lowest since at least 2000 and farming productivity had been hit.
The Great Barrier Reef, which has just experienced its third mass bleaching event in five years, had escaped bleaching in 2019 but its condition remained poor.
World heritage-listed Gondwana rainforests, the Blue Mountains, alpine regions, eastern Gippsland and Kangaroo Island had all been badly hit by bushfires.
A co-author of the report, Dr Marta Yebra, said: “Our data clearly shows that the combination of dry forests and hot weather made for an especially explosive mixture.”

All the findings and data from the report, now in its fifth year, can be viewed on a website and interactive map.

'The animals aren't pleased': UK zoos under coronavirus lockdown



Three keepers at London zoo
Keepers at London zoo practise social distancing. Photograph: ZSL/PA

It’s easy enough for Darren McGarry to socially distance from other people as his home is based in Edinburgh zoo. McGarry, who has worked for the zoo for 34 years, can go an entire day without seeing someone since a UK-wide lockdown forced non-essential businesses to close.
Though zoos across the country are unusually quiet, zookeepers are faced with the challenge of ensuring life goes on as normal for the animals they care for amid a pandemic that has profoundly altered British society.
At Marwell zoo, based in Winchester, some staff have moved into empty cottages on site to continue caring for the animals. Ian Goodwin, the animal collection manager, said: “If they are people who live together in a house out of the zoo, we’ve brought some of them into the cottages that are empty.”

Undated handout photo issued by Marwell Zoo showing a male red panda, Peter, who arrived last year at Marwell Zoo, Winchester.
Peter, a male red panda, who arrived at Marwell zoo last year. Photograph: Marwell Zoo/PA

He said staff who lived on site or those who came in were rigorously following social distancing guidelines. “They have their tea and dinner breaks at different times and they go home at different times. The animals are still getting their care they need throughout the day, we’re just limited to how many keepers we have on site or at the same time.”
At Twycross zoo in Leicestershire, staff have moved to live on site, while London zoo has repurposed its visitor lodges into temporary accommodation for essential staff. Keepers in London have also been giving extra attention to the pygmy goats, who have been “waiting patiently for visitors who never turn up”.
Derek Grove, the director at Dudley zoo, said keepers who could not live on site had gone to great lengths to ensure there were not any significant changes to the animals’ routines. “We’ve got orangutans and chimpanzees and they do get used to people and the way you work around them, the routine that you have. As soon as you start changing things, animals aren’t particularly pleased about it.”

Entrance to Dudley Zoo West Midlands UK
The entrance to Dudley zoo in the West Midlands.

Photograph: itdarbs/Alamy

But zookeepers are limited by the fact they are not classed as key workers, according to Gary Batters, the director of Banham zoo in Norfolk and African Alive in Suffolk.
“Unlike a factory and many other businesses that shut down and walk away, we do need to have a team of people working continuously to make sure our animals are well cared for,” Batters said. “We have issues with childcare where that makes it quite difficult for our teams to come in because they have other obligations at home.”
Zoos across the country warn they face a financial crisis as a result of being forced to shut to the public, with many launching fundraising campaigns to help them continue caring for the animals.
McGarry said zoos faced a similar crisis 20 years ago when the foot-and-mouth disease outbreak forced them to shut for nearly two months, but he believes the coronavirus could have a more significant impact. “This is so different because there’s always a chance that staff could start to go off sick with the virus,” he said.

Undated handout photo issued by Royal Zoological Society of Scotland (RZSS) of the new baby chimpanzee, with mother Heleen, that was born at Edinburgh Zoo on Monday February 3.
A newborn chimpanzee with her mother at Edinburgh zoo. Photograph: RZSS/Donald Gow/PA


While the “eerie” silence during the day has been peaceful, McGarry is looking forward to opening the zoo to the public again. “The chimpanzees start to wonder why there’s nobody wandering around and they go to the window to look for people.”

Trump lashes out at critics as Fauci warns New Orleans and Detroit will 'take off'

Donald Trump called Nancy Pelosi a “sick puppy” on Monday, after the House speaker said the president’s mishandling of the coronavirus crisis would contribute to deaths in the US that might have been avoided.
“She’s a sick puppy … that’s a terrible thing to say,” Trump said in a rambling hour-long call-in interview to the cable show Fox & Friends. “My poll numbers are the highest they’ve ever been because of her.”
While the president was attacking his adversaries, the top infectious-disease expert in the US warned that smaller cities were about to witness a rapid acceleration in coronavirus cases.
New Orleans and Detroit are showing signs that “they’re going to take off” and other, smaller cities are “percolating”, Dr Anthony Fauci, the director of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases, told ABC News.
According to researchers at Johns Hopkins University, by Monday nearly 143,000 Covid-19 cases had been confirmed in the US, with more than 2,500 deaths. New York is by far the state worst hit, with nearly 60,000 cases and about 1,000 deaths.
As the emergency has accelerated, Trump has stepped up his war of words with Democrats and the media, in what critics see as an attempt to distract from the administration’s failings in confronting the virus.
Widespread testing remains unavailable in most of the US, healthcare workers and local leaders raise a daily alarm about dire shortages of medical equipment, and state leaders have imposed a patchwork of restrictions – or declined to impose restrictions – in what emergency response experts have described as a vacuum of federal leadership.
In news conferences, Trump has swung between false assurance – that business as normal would resume by Easter – and crediting himself with avoiding what early models showed could be a worst-case scenario of millions of deaths.
In his interview on Monday, Trump told the Fox News hosts he had saved the country from “deaths like you have never seen before”.
Pelosi told CNN on Sunday that “the president’s denial at the beginning was deadly” and said “his delay in getting equipment to where it’s needed is deadly … As the president fiddles, people are dying.”
Trump’s charges drew fire from New York’s mayor.
“I find that insulting to our healthcare workers,” Bill de Blasio told CNN. “I find it insensitive.
“What the president should be doing is praising our healthcare workers, not suggesting somehow they’re doing something wrong with the supplies that have been sent. That’s just insensitive and it’s unhelpful.”
The long-running feud between Trump and New York state leaders simmered as dramatic pictures emerged of the US navy hospital ship USNS Comfort arriving in New York harbor. The ship, which can accommodate about 1,000 patients, will not treat coronavirus victims but will take other patients to relieve hospitals on land.
“Welcome to New York, USNS Comfort,” Governor Andrew Cuomo tweeted. “We knew from the outset that expanded hospital capacity was critical. We asked and the federal government answered.”

New York governor Andrew Cuomo in Manhattan as the USNS Comfort arrives in New York.
The New York governor, Andrew Cuomo, in Manhattan as the USNS Comfort arrives in New York. Photograph: Carlo Allegri/Reuters

Vermont issued an order requiring any person coming from outside the state “for anything other than an essential purpose” to home-quarantine for 14 days. Arizona announced that schools would remain closed through the end of the spring term. And the Republican governor of Florida, who has resisted issuing a statewide stay-at-home order, urged residents in four southern counties to stay home through “mid-May”.
Fauci said at the weekend the US could see more than a million cases and suffer 100,000 to 200,000 deaths. “I don’t want to see it, I’d like to avoid it, but I wouldn’t be surprised if we saw 100,000 deaths,” he said on Monday.
As recently as late February, Trump claimed publicly that the virus would simply “disappear”. But on Fox & Friends he credited his administration with avoiding a death toll in the millions.
“That’s a lot,” he said.
Political leaders from both parties have indicated that Washington could follow its $2tn coronavirus relief package with more stimulus bills, but Trump on Monday criticized Democrats’ demands for protections of the 2020 election in November.
As part of the initial relief package, Democrats sought a provision, later discarded, that would allow all voters to cast ballots by mail.
“The things they had in there were crazy,” Trump told Fox & Friends. “They had levels of voting, that if you ever agreed to it you’d never have a Republican elected in this country again.”

Coronavirus two-person rule: what we know about this and Australia's other social distancing measures

Scott Morrison tightens restrictions, but how they are applied will vary state by state
On Sunday night the prime minister announced the tightening of restrictions to try to stop the spread of Covid-19, limiting gatherings to a maximum of two people.
But Scott Morrison didn’t go into details on exactly how this applies to everyday life, and it appears rules could vary from state to state. Here is what we know so far.

What did Morrison say?

This is what the prime minister said at the press conference:
“Advice has now been strengthened to say that [guidelines] should be reduced to two persons in public spaces and other areas of gathering.
“Unless it’s your household, the family, those who are living at your residence, that being with only one other person as a gathering outside is what is required. That provides, importantly, for those who may be getting daily exercise, particularly for women, that they wouldn’t be required to walk on their own and they’d be able to walk with another person.
“It’s your household, so your household can be together inside your home, outside your home, outside of your household. If you were out … just on the street today, you could be there with everyone who’s in your household. But if you weren’t with the members of your household, you could be there with one other person maximum.”

Are these recommendations, or enforceable by law?

What Morrison announced on Sunday are technically just recommendations endorsed by the national cabinet. The federal government is leaving it up to states to decide if and how they will enforce them.
So far Western Australia and Tasmania have said they will be enforcing the new limits, while Queensland, New South Wales, Victoria and the Australian Capital Territory have gone further.
Queensland has announced a state of emergency, and along with enforcing the two-person limit, residents are now only allowed to leave their home for one of eight essential reasons. These are, to obtain food or other essential goods or services, to receive media care, to exercise, to go to work at an essential business, to visit a terminally ill relative or attend a funeral, to care for immediate family members, to attend court or to go to childcare, school or university. Police can issue fines for non-compliance.
In a statement the Australian Capital Territory chief minister, Andrew Barr, said the ACT would also enforce the two-person limit and, as in Queensland, residents can only leave their home for certain essential reasons. The statement said ACT police officers would be issuing a warning in the first instance if a person did not comply. It did not specify what the penalties would be.
The NSW police commissioner, Mick Fuller, said NSW would have new laws regarding the two-person limit in place by Monday night and foreshadowed that police would be on the streets to enforce them.
A spokesperson for the NSW Premier’s office later confirmed to Guardian Australia that fines could be issued to individuals who leave the house for a non-essential reason. But they said it would be at the discretion of individual police officers to decide who would be fined.
They could not clarify what evidence citizens would need to provide to prove why they had left home, saying this would also be left to police judgment.
It’s understood that Victoria will be moving to a similar system.
On Monday morning Victoria’s premier, Daniel Andrews, said the state had officially moved into “stage three” and would make the two-person limit legally enforceable from midnight.
“If you are having friends over for dinner or friends over for drinks that are not members of your household, then you are breaking the law,” he said at a press conference. “You face an on-the-spot fine of more than $1,600 and Victoria police will not hesitate to take action against you. That is how serious this is.”
Tasmania will do the same, with premier Peter Gutwein saying those who do not comply will be arrested and charged.
WA premier Mark McGowan was expected to announce similar laws on Monday.
So far only the Northern Territory announced it would not be enforcing the new rule. Its chief minister, Michael Gunner, said it would stick to the 10-person limit for now but would bring in stricter laws if people did not follow social distancing rules.
“If the police need to go around enforcing a lower limit, they will, but we expect territorians will do the right thing and save our police the time and hassle,” he said.

Do they apply inside private homes or just in public places?

They do not apply to members of your household, however, so family units and groups of roommates can still spend time together and even go outside as a group.
Federal guidelines suggest that no matter how many people are in your home, you are allowed a maximum of one additional person over as a guest at a time. However, in states enforcing “stay at home laws”, the guest would have to be visiting for an essential reason.
Technically, if a household is out together in public they can also have one additional guest with them, but this isn’t recommended, and again varies based on state.

What if a family is split across two households?

The federal government has recommended that these laws do not apply to families that are split across households.
For example, if a mother and a child live separately to a father and another child, they would still be allowed to visit each other, despite being over the two-person limit.
However, it is important to note this applies only to immediate family members – that is, children and their guardians.
It appears generally this rule does not apply to adult children.
The new rules around families and visitors have created some confusion and Guardian Australia has approached state premiers with a series of questions about allowable scenarios. This piece will be updated as we receive responses.
A spokesperson for the NSW government said this was still under deliberation.

Are there different rules for those over 70?

The NSW premier, Gladys Berejiklian, also stressed this in a press conference on Monday.
“Especially to our older Australians, the older people, if you’re over 70, you shouldn’t leave home at all,” she said. “I know this is difficult and I appreciate that for some parts of the day, people might want to get out and exercise. That is OK, so long as you don’t come into contact with anybody else.”
However, for the time being, this would remain a recommendation and those who did not comply would not be fined or penalised.
The prime minister also recommended those over the age of 60 with chronic illness and Indigenous people over 50 do the same.

What about weddings and funerals?

Each state will enforce their own rules on this, however, the federal advice is that weddings and funeral be exempt, with the current limits still applying.

This means no more than five people at a wedding, and generally no more than ten at a funeral.

From tight purse strings to massive fiscal firepower: the Coalition’s staggering transformation

Scott Morrison
Morrison made it clear why the government was acting on this scale. Events demand a new rulebook. We are all on the brink, Australia, and the rest of the world, and this Covid-19 pandemic has put us there. Photograph: Mike Bowers/The Guardian

On 12 March Scott Morrison came to his courtyard with $17.6bn. A week later the Reserve Bank of Australia cut the cash rate to 0.25% and pumped more than $100bn into the financial system in an effort to keep struggling businesses afloat and stave off substantial job losses.
On 22 March Morrison returned to his courtyard with another $66bn. Then on 30 March, Monday, the prime minister came back with $130bn for wage subsidies. Monday’s $130bn will be spent not over the four-year forward estimates, which is the budgetary convention. It will be spent over the next six months.
This kind of investment is staggering – bigger than the annual health and education budgets combined.
We are losing a sense of the scale of these interventions because they are coming so thick and fast, the billions cascading into one another. But this is truly staggering.
The shapeshift of this particular Coalition government is also staggering.
When the Reserve Bank spent months last year trying to persuade this government to unleash some stimulus to help the sputtering pre-pandemic economy, Morrison and the treasurer Josh Frydenberg said, repeatedly, talk to the hand. We’ve gone from “only panic merchants do stimulus” to $130bn flying out the door in six months, few questions asked.
You’d say the current behaviour displays all the zeal of the convert, and that observation would be entirely true and valid, except it doesn’t really deliver the required insight.
Morrison made it clear on Monday why the government was acting, and acting on this scale. Events demand a new rulebook. We are all on the brink, Australia, and the rest of the world, and this Covid-19 pandemic has put us there.
The only thing that stands between all of us and the worst-case scenario is continued physical distancing, and massive fiscal firepower.
“Many countries in the months ahead and perhaps beyond that may well see their economies collapse,” the prime minister warned reporters. “Some may see them hollow out in the very worst of circumstances, we could see countries themselves fall into chaos”. The prime minister insisted Australia would be different. “This will not be Australia.”
The government did not want to go down the path of wage subsidies initially. It resisted the idea. But with Australia’s two most populous states pulling inexorably in the direction of lockdowns, with employers screaming for help, and job losses mounting everyday, wage subsidies is where the centre of gravity ultimately rested.
Over the past week or so, Morrison has begun framing his conceptual task. He wants to put the economy to sleep for six months. In preparing for that end point, he wants to make sure as many people as possible remain connected to their livelihoods to try and prevent unemployment carnage on the other side.

"How deep is this fiscal hole and how do we begin to recover? Honestly, who knows, and right now that is the least of our problems."

If people can remain connected to their jobs, and if businesses can hibernate and return in the spring with as few accumulated liabilities as possible, then the economic damage associated with this event is more likely transient than permanent.
This is the working theory in any case, and it is sound as far as it goes.
The main problem is nobody knows whether the pandemic will conform to the arbitrary six-month timeframe the government is currently putting on it both for fiscal reasons and to try and manage the country through the various transitions of the crisis without creating panic.
Will Morrison be back here in another six months, with another $130bn?
How deep is this fiscal hole and how do we begin to recover in a budgetary sense after this shock? Honestly, who knows, and right now that is the least of our problems.
Business has largely welcomed Monday’s wage subsidy announcement, while reserving the right to nitpick as the proposal is turned into legislation over the coming week or so. There will be nitpicking, sure as night follows day.
From the point of view of employees, this will obviously be comfort.
But there are questions.
Casual workers need to have been working regularly for same employer for 12 months or more to qualify for the new wage subsidy. How many casual workers will be in this position? Some will of course, but I suspect many casuals won’t, given the nature of casual work. New Zealanders in Australia are eligible for help but other workers on temporary visas aren’t. These poor people remain in limbo, at risk of destitution.
This scheme does give Australian workers a shot of seeing out this crisis while still remaining connected to their employers. That’s sound policy-making.
But there are no guarantees of what will happen after this pandemic passes. There is no guarantee employers will emerge from this crisis and roll back into business as usual, with their workforces intact, without skipping a beat.
In fact there is only one thing we can guarantee about this crisis.

There are no guarantees.

Monday, 30 March 2020

THE WORKER - News summary week ending September 18, 1895.

*THE WORKER*
BRISBANE, SEPTEMBER 21, 1895.

General News Summary.

FOR THE WEEK ENDING SEPTEMBER 18.



Cholera at Honolulu.
A rebellion in parts of China.
Drought in N.S.W. breaks up.
Gladstone condemns bimetallism.
Heavy traffic on the Central railway.
Shoals of herrings in Sydney Harbour.
Terrible bush fires and drought in N.S.W.
Turkish troops torture Bulgarian notables.
Brisbane contractor loses 1500 gallons of tar by fire.
Forged £1 and £5 notes circulated in Melbourne.
Prayers for rain offered in the churches in Sydney.
Body of a man found hanging on a tree near Wellshot.
Alderman Jones re-elected mayor of South Brisbane.
Proposal to establish electric tramways in Brisbane.
Great Britain annexes an island in the Persian Gulf.
Fatal balloon accident in Belgium; four persons killed.
Good prices still continue in the London wool market.
An African Sultan expels the French from his territory.
Stoppage of Georgetown crushing mills for want of water.
Offices of the New York World partially destroyed by fire.
Seizure of two illicit stills in Sydney; owners fined £100 each.
Shipment of Australian rabbits sells for 1s. each in London.
Another case of Leprosy reported at the Lower Burdekin.
Roman Catholic Church at Rushworth, Vic., destroyed by fire.
Mrs. Blair commits suicide with a revolver at Newstead, Vic.
Fifteen per cent advance in prices at the Sydney wool sales.
Railway train derailed in Victoria through running into a cow.
A Brisbane preacher fined £3 for defaming a publican.
Brisbane barber fined 5s. for shaving customers on a Sunday.
British consul at Wenchow, China, stoned by a mob of Chinamen.
A prisoner in Parramatta Goal commits suicide with a piece of tin.
Government geologist prospecting for coal in the Central District.
Frederick Baggs, a farmer at Baldina, commits suicide by shooting.
Big gunpowder explosion at Kentucky, U.S. Six soldiers killed.
Two more Kanakas arrested at Mackay in connection with a murder.
W. J. O’Connell, school teacher at Coonamble, hangs himself.
The old convict hulk Success spoken in mid ocean voyaging to England.
Election riots in Limerick, Ireland; forty-six persons seriously injured.
A prisoner named Morgan escapes in chains from the goal at Perth, W.A.
Big mortality from disease amongst the French troops in Madagascar.
Several little boys flogged in Brisbane by order of the police magistrate.
Mark Twain arrives at Sydney on a lecturing tour throughout Australia.
Spain sends 25,000 additional soldiers to Cuba to fight the revolutionists.
Disastrous avalanche in Switzerland. Ten persons killed and 200 cattle lost.
Watchman at the Co-operative battery, Bendigo gagged, and gold stolen.
General Booth obtains a gift of 20,000 acres of land in Swaziland, South Africa.
A tree falls on a woman named Denton at Mellemalong, N.S.W., and kills her.
Republican Government of Hawaii pardons the ex-Queen imprisoned for rebellion.
A Melbourne solicitor, named Robert Orme, arrested on a charge of false pretences.
Northern Territory blacks raid a Chinaman’s home near Wyndham and spear a boy.
Melbourne Cricket Club derives a profit of £3,349 from recent visit of English team.
Libel action commenced against the Melbourne Argus; damages laid at £10,000.
John Mott falls down the hold of the schooner Omega, at Bowen, and is killed.
Three hundred natives of the south-east of Africa slaughtered by Portuguese soldiers.
Sheriff’s bailiff of Toowoomba gets £50 damages and costs from the Brisbane Sun.
The whole of the crew of the ship John Eua arrested at Newcastle for disobeying orders.
Harry Cargill arrested in Sydney in connection with the recent burglary in Townsville.
Two Melbourne solicitors and three other men committed for trial on a charge of conspiracy.
Union Jack Gold Mining Company, Ravenswood floated in London with a capital of £80,000.
British man-of-war opens fire on a fleet of Arab dhows in the Persian Gulf and sinks 40 of them.
The barque Dharwar arrives in Melbourne with the shipwrecked crew of the Prince Oscar on board.
Mount Prior Wine Works at Rutbergles, Vic., destroyed by fire; 100,000 gallons lost.
Joseph and Sarah Lane, aged respectively 82 and 72 years, burned to death at Elsternwick Vic.
Lady Gunning, the widow of a clergyman, gets twelve months’ hard labour in England for forgery.
A Chinaman sentenced to one month’s imprisonment for lighting a fire in Parramatta Park N.S.W.
Johm Muellar, at Springton, S.A., unsuccessfully attempts to murder his wife, and then hangs himself.
Sir James Garrick refuses the position of Supreme Court Judge offered to him by Queensland Government.
A Dubbo storekeeper named Albert Whitely shoots his wife dead and then unsuccessfully attempts to commit suicide.
Reported that a train on the New York Central railway ran 456 1⁄2 miles in 407minutes. Fastest travelling on record.
Government of Cape Colony sending two practical farmers to Australia to inquire into the method of wheat-growing.
Publisher of the Melbourne Argus summoned to the bar of the Legislative Assembly for alleged libel on an M.L.A.
Terrible fire breaks out on a steamer between Leith and London; seven women burned to death and many passengers injured.
Mrs. Dean, alleged victim of poisoning, and whose husband was sentenced to death and afterwards acquitted in Sydney, sues for maintenance.

'If I get corona, I get corona': the Americans who wish they'd taken Covid-19 seriously

Two men wrestle each other as spring break revelers look on on March 17 in Pompano Beach, Florida. As a response to the coronavirus pandemic, the governor ordered all bars be shut down for 30 days.
Two men wrestle each other as spring break revelers look on on 17 March in Pompano Beach, Florida. Photograph: Julio Cortez/AP

The past few weeks have brought considerable reason to question the purpose of human existence. Between the examples of influencers licking toilets during this pandemic and the people who think it’s funny to cough on food at the grocery store, are we seriously still supposed to believe in Darwin’s theory of evolution?

Although people continually and recklessly flouting social distancing rules is infuriating, we, the sensible public, can at least rest safe in the knowledge that experts are experts for a reason, and ignoring them is not best advised. What’s the point in respecting all those measures if no one else is listening, I hear you ask?
Well, it turns out that some of this month’s biggest violators are having to learn these lessons themselves. So before you consider doing something stupid, too, read this list.

The partying spring breakers now regret partying

If anyone wanted an excuse to tar all young people as irresponsible and selfish, they would need to look no further than the University of Tampa. They went viral a few weeks back after footage showed students on spring break partying it up on a beach, despite government guidance to socially distance from one another. One student, Brady Sluder, even justified himself to CBS, saying: “If I get corona, I get corona, at the end of the day I’m not gonna let it stop me from partying.”


“If I get corona, I get corona. At the end of the day, I'm not gonna let it stop me from partying”: Spring breakers are still flocking to Miami, despite coronavirus warnings. https://cbsn.ws/33sb67i
6:15 AM - Mar 19, 2020

But now the University of Tampa has confirmed that at least five of those students have tested positive – and it turns out the students are feeling pretty bad about it. Sluder has taken to Instagram to apologize publicly, meanwhile others have expressed regret over the implications that their actions could now have on loved ones.

Ron Paul may have to stop denying the virus, since his son has it

On 16 March, the former Texas congressman Ron Paul wrote an articled titled: The Coronavirus Hoax. In the article, he accused Democrats of using the coronavirus to “grab more power and authority in the name of fighting a virus that thus far has killed less than 100 Americans”.
Then again, Rand Paul was still hitting the gym and swimming in the White House pool while awaiting his results, so maybe that’s a little too hopeful.

A toilet-licking influencer is left with a bad taste

It is not confirmed that this TikTok influencer’s coronavirus was contracted the moment that he decided to lick a toilet seat, but I am going to take a punt and suggest that it wasn’t the best thing he could have done.
The influencer, known as Larz, posted footage of himself in a hospital bed on Sunday, according to the Daily Mail, confirming that he has tested positive for the virus.
He had licked the public toilet as part of a social media challenge called “Coronavirus Challenge” which is about as dumb as it sounds, and involves licking stuff, like produce at the grocery store, for reasons unknown to me.
Larz was criticised for engaging in the challenge on a chatshow last week. On the show, he also said that he doesn’t talk to his mom because she doesn’t have enough followers. Right.

Coronavirus partiers should have stayed at home

While many of us are spending the pandemic cooped up indoors, salivating over photos from the time when we were allowed out in public, others are taking a more laissez-faire approach to social distancing. By which I mean they are not trying to social distance, not even a little bit.
In fact, some jokers have been attending “coronavirus parties”, because, lol, pandemics are funny now.


Anyway, it turns out that – you guessed it – someone who attended a coronavirus party in Kentucky has contracted Covid-19. That person will be happy to know that the Kentucky governor, Andy Beshear, has found it in his heart to forgive, at least.